My 5 year old has some serious swag. At least I think it's called swag. That's what the kids these days are calling it. Now that I'm older, sometimes I'm not as "down with that" and I don't "pick up what they are putting down" like I used to. For this post, though, I'm going to be "with it".
I have never had swag. And by "swag", I mean "the confidence to go up and talk to a woman, buy her a drink, etc."
I also didn't pick up signals very well, either. On the REMOTE chance that a woman would flirt with me, she would've been better off holding up a sign that said "I'm interested in you. Please ask me out on a date!" It would probably have to blink, too.
I'm sure it amazed friends and family when I landed a wife. I'm pretty confident wagers were lost.
Exhibit A: We were at a church picnic and my son was playing in the makeshift misters in the parking lot and, the next thing I know, some girl (about his age) is reciting her address to him.
That's right: my man got digits. Not a phone number...an address.
When we were leaving the pool this summer, the little girl he was playing with jumped out of the pool and ran all the way to the exit just to say goodbye. Yep, lifeguard warnings be damned...she was going to say goodbye.
|Like I said: Swag|
The way I see it, here's what he has going for him:
- He's a redhead. He stands out above all of the non-gingers.
- He has personality in spades.
- He has to get a laugh. Has to.
- He's kind.
- He's polite.
- He's respectful.
Here's the thing: I have those traits! What the heck? Oh, wait...he isn't sarcastic. Maybe that has something to do with it.
Regardless, parents pride themselves on their kids' accomplishments be it sports, academics, etc.
Me? I'm gonna pride myself on my kid's swag.
Yep, that's how this "sick" dad is going to roll. Yo.